With the 2011 on its way out and 2012 on its way in, a lot of people will be making new years resolutions. I've always thought of resolutions as just another excuse to beat yourself up because its rare that anyone will follow thru with them.
Instead, this year a girl from work gave me a great idea. Instead of coming up with a bunch of resolutions, come up with a word. A word that you can use in everyday life to maybe change what you want or find some sort of comfort with. Just pick one word though or it will be too overwhelming.
My word is transformation. There are things I want to transform in my life such as my home (getting rid of the clutter), the way I think about certain things (stop blaming myself and look more realistically at things), some of my eating habits (so that I can lose some weight) and although it seems like a lot to take on, I know that it could be much simpler such as transforming a banana, orange juice and strawberries into a smoothie. Nothing has to be complex when you pick your word but whatever you do it must make you feel good about yourself and it cannot be for anyone but you!
While on facebook today I came across this link that I felt needed to be shared.. it really does speak to what I'm trying to do. Its about reflecting on what you can change.. the numbers I personally want to reflect on in 2012 is 7, 8,9,11,12,22, and 25.. it may seem like a lot but the others I feel I have overcome and I need to feel proud of myself for doing so!! Way to go me! ;-)
I hope everyone reading this has a healthy, safe and joyous 2012!!
30 Things to Stop doing to Yourself
As Maria Robinson once said, “Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.” Nothing could be closer to the truth. But before you can begin this process of transformation you have to stop doing the things that have been holding you back.
Here are some ideas to get you started:
1. Stop spending time with the wrong people. – Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you. If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you. You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot. Never, ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth. And remember, it’s not the people that stand by your side when you’re at your best, but the ones who stand beside you when you’re at your worst that are your true friends.
2. Stop running from your problems. – Face them head on. No, it won’t be easy. There is no person in the world capable of flawlessly handling every punch thrown at them. We aren’t supposed to be able to instantly solve problems. That’s not how we’re made. In fact, we’re made to get upset, sad, hurt, stumble and fall. Because that’s the whole purpose of living – to face problems, learn, adapt, and solve them over the course of time. This is what ultimately molds us into the person we become.
3. Stop lying to yourself. – You can lie to anyone else in the world, but you can’t lie to yourself. Our lives improve only when we take chances, and the first and most difficult chance we can take is to be honest with ourselves. Read The Road Less Traveled .
4. Stop putting your own needs on the back burner. – The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too. Yes, help others; but help yourself too. If there was ever a moment to follow your passion and do something that matters to you, that moment is now.
5. Stop trying to be someone you’re not. – One of the greatest challenges in life is being yourself in a world that’s trying to make you like everyone else. Someone will always be prettier, someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will never be you. Don’t change so people will like you. Be yourself and the right people will love the real you.
6. Stop trying to hold onto the past. – You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading your last one.
7. Stop being scared to make a mistake. – Doing something and getting it wrong is at least ten times more productive than doing nothing. Every success has a trail of failures behind it, and every failure is leading towards success. You end up regretting the things you did NOT do far more than the things you did.
8. Stop berating yourself for old mistakes. – We may love the wrong person and cry about the wrong things, but no matter how things go wrong, one thing is for sure, mistakes help us find the person and things that are right for us. We all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past. But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future. Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
9. Stop trying to buy happiness. – Many of the things we desire are expensive. But the truth is, the things that really satisfy us are totally free – love, laughter and working on our passions.
10. Stop exclusively looking to others for happiness. – If you’re not happy with who you are on the inside, you won’t be happy in a long-term relationship with anyone else either. You have to create stability in your own life first before you can share it with someone else. Read Stumbling on Happiness .
11. Stop being idle. – Don’t think too much or you’ll create a problem that wasn’t even there in the first place. Evaluate situations and take decisive action. You cannot change what you refuse to confront. Making progress involves risk. Period! You can’t make it to second base with your foot on first.
12. Stop thinking you’re not ready. – Nobody ever feels 100% ready when an opportunity arises. Because most great opportunities in life force us to grow beyond our comfort zones, which means we won’t feel totally comfortable at first.
13. Stop getting involved in relationships for the wrong reasons. – Relationships must be chosen wisely. It’s better to be alone than to be in bad company. There’s no need to rush. If something is meant to be, it will happen – in the right time, with the right person, and for the best reason. Fall in love when you’re ready, not when you’re lonely.
14. Stop rejecting new relationships just because old ones didn’t work. – In life you’ll realize that there is a purpose for everyone you meet. Some will test you, some will use you and some will teach you. But most importantly, some will bring out the best in you.
15. Stop trying to compete against everyone else. – Don’t worry about what others doing better than you. Concentrate on beating your own records every day. Success is a battle between YOU and YOURSELF only.
16. Stop being jealous of others. – Jealousy is the art of counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own. Ask yourself this: “What’s something I have that everyone wants?”
17. Stop complaining and feeling sorry for yourself. – Life’s curve balls are thrown for a reason – to shift your path in a direction that is meant for you. You may not see or understand everything the moment it happens, and it may be tough. But reflect back on those negative curve balls thrown at you in the past. You’ll often see that eventually they led you to a better place, person, state of mind, or situation. So smile! Let everyone know that today you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday, and you will be.
18. Stop holding grudges. – Don’t live your life with hate in your heart. You will end up hurting yourself more than the people you hate. Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.” It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.” Forgiveness is the answer… let go, find peace, liberate yourself! And remember, forgiveness is not just for other people, it’s for you too. If you must, forgive yourself, move on and try to do better next time.
19. Stop letting others bring you down to their level. – Refuse to lower your standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs.
20. Stop wasting time explaining yourself to others. – Your friends don’t need it and your enemies won’t believe it anyway. Just do what you know in your heart is right.
21. Stop doing the same things over and over without taking a break. – The time to take a deep breath is when you don’t have time for it. If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting. Sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly.
22. Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments. – Enjoy the little things, because one day you may look back and discover they were the big things. The best portion of your life will be the small, nameless moments you spend smiling with someone who matters to you.
23. Stop trying to make things perfect. – The real world doesn’t reward perfectionists, it rewards people who get things done. Read Getting Things Done .
24. Stop following the path of least resistance. – Life is not easy, especially when you plan on achieving something worthwhile. Don’t take the easy way out. Do something extraordinary.
25. Stop acting like everything is fine if it isn’t. – It’s okay to fall apart for a little while. You don’t always have to pretend to be strong, and there is no need to constantly prove that everything is going well. You shouldn’t be concerned with what other people are thinking either – cry if you need to – it’s healthy to shed your tears. The sooner you do, the sooner you will be able to smile again.
26. Stop blaming others for your troubles. – The extent to which you can achieve your dreams depends on the extent to which you take responsibility for your life. When you blame others for what you’re going through, you deny responsibility – you give others power over that part of your life.
27. Stop trying to be everything to everyone. – Doing so is impossible, and trying will only burn you out. But making one person smile CAN change the world. Maybe not the whole world, but their world. So narrow your focus.
28. Stop worrying so much. – Worry will not strip tomorrow of its burdens, it will strip today of its joy. One way to check if something is worth mulling over is to ask yourself this question: “Will this matter in one year’s time? Three years? Five years?” If not, then it’s not worth worrying about.
29. Stop focusing on what you don’t want to happen. – Focus on what you do want to happen. Positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story. If you awake every morning with the thought that something wonderful will happen in your life today, and you pay close attention, you’ll often find that you’re right.
30. Stop being ungrateful. – No matter how good or bad you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life. Someone somewhere else is desperately fighting for theirs. Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing.
CREDIT: Full article written by Marc at Marcandangel.com HERE
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
What defines you? Your job? Your hobby? The role you take in your family?
How do you know if you're good at something? Does someone tell you or do you just know?
Who do you turn to when you need somebody? Your mom, dad, sibling, spouse, child, friend, God?
Imagine if you will, there is no purpose in your life. Nothing defines you. You don't know if you are good at something. And you have no one to turn to when you are in need. Can you imagine it? Close your eyes.. take just a moment.. can you feel the loneliness? The isolation? The emptiness?
Its not something that most people can imagine because they have never, thank God, had to.
Now, imagine being a wife and a mother. You are successful in your job and you have some close friends you can turn to when you need to. But wait.. there is still loneliness, isolation and emptiness.. it doesn't matter how many people you have in your life.. it doesn't matter how successful you are in your life... nothing matters except for the way you interpret life.
Are you happy? Are you joyful? What makes you happy? Hot tea, clean sheets, a snuggle with my dog and the smell of the rain after the grass is cut makes me happy. Spending time with friends and family also makes me happy. Did you know that things that make you happy usually end up being external things? What makes you joyful? Being at peace, spiritual understanding and fulfillment, having a purpose to my life and knowing I'm loved makes me joyful.
No one wants to be unhappy. No one wants to be alone. And no one can change your situation but you. If you want to be happy and joyful and have a purpose to your life you need to open your heart and trust that life has more to offer. Even on the hardest of days, be thankful. Buy a one way ticket and get out of Pity City today.. no one is going to do it for you. No one can.
Saturday, December 03, 2011
I'm use to have my Christmas shopping done by this time of year.. actually, I was usually done by the middle of November but alas, I am dragging my heals this year. Thank goodness for online shopping! I hate having to battle the parking lots at the mall.. I swear, those are worse than actually going into the mall.. but.. online shopping.. no parking lots, no line-ups, no crowds, no screaming children... and some of the sites even have gift wrapping!
However.. the downside to online shopping is its hard to get into the season.. in a way I am missing the Christmas music in the stores and people in good cheer and Christmas decorations. I've downloaded some Christmas songs and will watch, It's a Wonderful Life with James Stewart.. that's sure to put me in the Christmas spirit!
The thing is, Christmas isn't about the shopping or the presents or the music or the television programs.. for me, it's about the birth of Christ and all that He has done in my life that I have to be thankful for. I forget sometimes to stop and be thankful.. not just for all the good in my life but also for the pain and life lessons I've had to endure.. oh sure I wish I could just wake up one day and have my life be perfect.. but how would I know what that is without living thru the imperfect life I have?
Thank you Lord for giving me the life you have. For teaching me the lessons I need to learn and placing challenges in my path so I can learn those lessons. Amen.