Last Day Of My 30's!

Someone asked me how I felt about entering my 40's tomorrow. Well let's see... I like the number 40. I like how it sounds. I love how my friends in their 40's look better than they did in their 20's and 30's. I hated my 30's. Not that it was all bad. I took my first big trip on an airplane and got to share that with my mom. I bought my first home and my first car all on my own. I also got my first dog who is my best friend these days. I have also worked my entire 30's at the same job as a social worker and I still like it. I also finally got, not just one, but two great nieces! And my best friend had a little girl who I also adore. Two of my sisters got married and I got my photography certificate.

I won't miss the later part of my 30's. They were the most life altering changes namely losing my mom and almost dying in the hospital when I had my pressure sore. I've spent too much time in the hospital for serious things. Losing my mom was by far the most difficult thing and then not dealing with it well didn't help matters. I felt very alone. My sisters and dad tried to help in their own way but they all had their own families and lives and sometimes I just felt like I was more in the way or more of an obligation. I'm sure they would all disagree but I can't help how I feel.

What am I looking forward to in my 40's? Well it's another year closer to death! Oh that's terrible, seriously it's a mystery. I know what I hope to happen. I hope to go to Vegas with my sister and if that doesn't happen (as she has people to go with) then maybe a friend. I've signed up for Sledge hockey in June so that will be fun. I hope to get more active and maybe lose some weight along the way. I'd also love to take a photography road trip down the Oregon Coast to San Diego and thru Death Valley. I would love to go horseback riding and join basketball. Perhaps i'll look at getting my Masters if i can justify it with a career change. Beyond that I'm really not sure. I just have to believe a lot of good things will happen that will make my 40's the best decade to date!

Long time no blog!

Forgive me bloggers, it's been 2.5 years since my last blog... so there was a little hiccup in the blog department. My trip to California with my mom was so awesome! It was better than I could have ever imagined but sadly, two months after we got back, my mom passed away from congestive heart failure. Grief is a strange thing to go thru. I would never have thought I, of all people, would have a breakdown and end up in a mental hospital! But, alas I did. Accepting that mom was gone was too much to bare... it's still hard even now, but in a much healthier way. I was put on anti-depressants and anti-psychotic drugs that not only masked any grief I should have gone thru, it screwed up my memory something fierce! All I can say is thank God I have the family and friends I have, because what I put them thru is something I wouldn't wish on anybody!

The shrink had me so over-medicated and the only reason things changed is because I ended up with kidney failure and a severe pressure sore (not related to the drugs) that was almost lethal. I ended up in the hospital for 9 months!! The hospital doctors changed the doses and discontinued most of the meds I was on and thankfully after two years I'm finally back to myself.. pissyness and all! LOL

It's been a long haul in hospital.. after being so close to losing my left leg and half my pelvis, along with my life, I am close to being fully repaired again! After everything I've gone thru, you'd think going home would be the most exciting thing but let me tell you, it was one of the most scary things I had to face. Sounds ridiculous considering what had been going on in the last two years but when you are so drugged up and out of it, being clear-headed and having to face life again in a whole new context was frightening! At least when I was in my 'fog' as I will now refer to it, I didn't have to face reality.. or I did but chose not to.

But the train of life goes on and I need to make sure that I'm on the right track this time. I have so much to do and God only knows how much time to do it in... all things happen for a reason.. and I think I've found mine.

Here are a few pictures to encapsulate the last two years.... from weddings to births to rehab.. what a couple of years it's been!! LOL

Mom at Universal Studios April 07

Disneyland April07

La Jolla April 07

Wild Animal Park April07

SeaWorld April 07

(Nephew) Matthew and Mira's wedding May07

(Nephew) Rob and Tor's wedding July 07

(sister) Sandi and Roy's wedding Sept07

(Great Niece) Raeya Claire July 08

(Great nephew) Joshua November 08

(Sister) Carollyn and Mike's wedding May 09

And finally.. me, after losing OVER 60 lbs.. it took a 9 month hospital stay but there's always a silver lining somewhere!!

Wow Time Flies!

I can't believe how much time has passed since my last entry! Christmas was great as usual. Sandra, Roy and Luke came until Boxing day and then left.. my first year missing Luke's birthday. They won't be coming for Christmas next year which will be very sad for Luke.. he'll miss the presents but I think and hope, he'll miss the family more. Don't get me wrong.. he'll still get something for Christmas but I for one am not going to waste my money when I don't even get to see the kid open his gifts! And he's starting to get older, gifts aren't that important and he needs to learn that now so he doesn't expect it when he's older.

I'm getting really excited to go on my trip to San Diego with my mom in May. I'm making the plans next weekend. We're going for two weeks and will be going to Disneyland, California Adventure and Universal Studio's. We are going to rent a car for hopefully the whole trip so we'll be able to take mini trips around the San Diego area. I want to get some good shots of the area so that's my motivation as usual.

I'm also planning on a trip to Las Vegas with a friend of mine. I've never been before so I'm really looking forward to that. There are so many free things to do there! And there's lots to with animals so I'm psyched! Plus I recently went into a casino for the first time.. I loved the penny slots!!!

Well I hope everyone is in good health.. till I blog again...

Here are some pictures from Christmas..

Maddie and her new toy

Vern and his new toy Mom and her new hat!


Luke with his Dragonology book and Maddie in her new collar and new blanket gramma made her!
And after years of not having my picture taken.. I finally bit the bullet (so to say) and had a friend of mine take this.. I gave it to everyone at Christmas..